Rape Survival and
Recovery
Both women and men have a wide array of feelings after
being sexually assaulted or raped. Those feelings that are most frequently
experienced are discussed below, but please remember that this is simply a guide
and that every person is unique!
Fear
of:Being alone and/or being in
crowds; rapist returning; places, people, things that remind them of the
assault; others finding out - and what they will think; men in general; having
to report or go to court; their own rage; going to sleep (recurring
nightmares).
Guilt:for having
"caused the rape"; for not resisting more; for resisting too much; for being
"stupid" enough to get into that situation; for all the reactions they are
having; for not being able to nurture others at this time; for having "engaged
in sex" (cultural/religious implications).
Anger:at oneself
for "letting it happen"; at significant others for not understanding/protecting;
at society and the system; at the assailant - may want to kill, castrate or
humiliate him; at the total disruption of life.
Shame &
Embarrassment:feel dirty,
despoiled, humiliated; feels everyone can tell by looking at her.
Betrayal:by assailant,
if someone they knew, however briefly; by God; by reactions of significant
others; by the system.
Lack of
Trust:of their own ability to
make judgments; of men/people in general.
Powerlessness and
Depression:feel they've lost
all control over body and life; feel helpless to effect change; feel it will
never get better; feel totally victimized by the assault; feel totally
victimized by being a woman in this society.
Return To
Table